Four-footed and Winged Neighbors

This afternoon I laid down on a warm slab of rock at the bottom of this picture. What a wonderful feeling it was having the warm afternoon sun on my legs and belly, a huge, warm rock on my back, and a cool mountain breeze bringing a perfect balance. I was listening to the cry of a bird of prey in the valley and enjoying the sound of the wind when, a few minutes later, a hummingbird came and lit on a leafless tree a few yards from me. We both looked at each other for about 10 seconds then s/he zoomed over my stomach. I liked that it wasn't afraid to fly towards me.

Five to ten minutes later, some kind of chipmunk(?) jumped onto a rock below me. It was brown with black and white stripes running down its head and back. It had white stripes lining its eyes and was about 5 inches long with a long tail in the air. It then jumped onto a rock closer to have a better look. I was glad it was not afraid either. It then went away, only to appear about 10 minutes later and perched itself on a rock. It made a chuckling noise and I clicked my tongue. She cocked her head. We then had a mysterious conversation. "Chuckle, chuckle", "Click.", "Chuckle.", "Click,click." "Chuckle", "Click". She couldn't stay too long and disappeared I think to take care of some chipmunk business.

My next visitor (actually I guess I was the visitor) was a 3-4 inch lizard who spotted me from a rock well below and to my surprise, started climbing the rocks to get within a few feet of me. While looking at me sideways with one eye, he pumped his chest a few times like he was doing pushups. I looked at him. After a few minutes of him looking at me sideways, I put my foot down on the rock less than a foot way (to see if he might want to come closer) and he did not move, but instead of looking at my foot, turned his head and looked at me square in the eyes. So interesting, that he knew our eyes were the point of communication between us and not my foot. I was glad that he trusted me and was not afraid even when I put my foot close to him. Anyway, we both lay on our respective rocks, enjoying the sun and looking at each other from time to time. It appears lizards are a bit more relaxed than chipmunks, but I think chipmunks would enjoy a good adventure. It was nice spending some time with my four-footed and winged neighbors today. Loving this place. :)

One with Source is Enough

While having Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (ME/CFS), this past week I read a passage that helped me as I have tried to tell others what I do. Trying to find consistent energy, a solution to ME/CFS, and improving my health doesn't always feel like an adequate/satisfying answer. I thought this might also help others struggling with wanting to be or have more at times, in whatever area that may be.

   "Give up defining yourself - to yourself or to others. You won't die. You will come to life. And don't be concerned with how others define you. When they define you, they are limiting themselves, so it's their problem. Whenever you interact with people, don't be there primarily as a function or a role, but as a field of conscious Presence.
   Why does the ego play roles? Because of one unexamined assumption, one fundamental error, one unconscious thought. That thought is: I am not enough. Other unconscious thoughts follow: I need to play a role in order to get what I need to be fully myself; I need to get more so that I can be more. But you cannot be more than you are because underneath your physical and psychological form, you are one with Life itself, one with Being. In form, you are and will always be inferior to some, superior to others. In essence, you are neither inferior nor superior to anyone. True self-esteem and true humility arise out of that realization."  --- from A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle p.109

Yes. I am one with God/Being/The Source of Life itself. I didn't choose to be where I am, but this is where I am. I didn't do anything wrong, this is just where God (the name I personally give to this Source of Life) has me. I've tried to get better, and after 6.5 years, I'm still trying. It could change, God could heal me in an instant, but that hasn't happened. It is all ok. I don't need to make a million dollars, or whatever amount, or be the hero to be enough. I am one with God, God loves me, and that is enough.

God, do with me what you will. Teach me what you will. Thank you for this life!